Get to know Burn One Productions, LLC

One of my best friends and a talented entrepreneur, Ashley Eberbach, runs a company called Burn One Productions, LLC in Los Angeles.  Ultimately it is to fund movie production, as she is a gifted screenwriter, producer, director, set designer, and pretty much everything else involved with films.  But to fund the movie production you can buy awesome apparel (some with designs by yours truly: the Cadi Car, the Detroit houses, and a couple others), and support her in other ways, and some of proceeds also go towards other good causes.

Be a fan and support a fabulous small business!  Go to the Burn One website here.

Gay Marriage Comments: Follow-up

It’s been suggested to me that I was too harsh in my last post.  I do understand why people would say that, but I also disagree.  I’ll admit that there were moments that I did feel mean while writing it, mainly because I know who the reader is and the reader knows who I am.  In part I felt mean because I was happy that someone was commenting on my blog, regardless of how he/she felt about it, clearly the post inspired the reader to respond, and that motivates me to no end.  If you’ve read the “About” section of my blog, you know that above all else I value communication, and I don’t want my reaction to the reader’s post to be interpreted as an unwillingness to discuss the topic, or any topic, for that matter.  I did actually go back and change the wording on the last point (which I’m guessing is the main point that provoked “harsh” comments), but less out of feeling regret and more to make the semantics more specific to what I meant.

On the other hand, while I will discuss and debate any issue as long as both sides are willing, there are certain issues that I feel are so obvious that they should not have two sides.  Among these I’d put gay marriage and LGBT rights in general, racial equality, gender equality, most civil rights issues.  I realize that gay marriage and gay rights have a more open debate than other issues, as we live in a society with strong religious forces that have very solid views on homosexuality.  But I don’t believe there should be any grey area there.  

Additionally, the fact that my comments provoked any sort of “you were a little harsh” reactions may be an indication of how much there is left to accomplish in the gay rights movement.  Imagine that tomorrow our government voted to pass a bill banning black people from marrying one another, or any other racial minority from marrying (or if they passed a bill making interracial marriage illegal, a part of our laws until not so long ago). If a reader posted a comment saying that if so many people voted for it then maybe that’s the way it should be, my reaction would certainly not be seen as harsh.  Racism absolutely exists in this country, but if anything my reaction would probably be thought of as not harsh enough.  Indeed, for all the work still left to be done in achieving racial equality in the United States, gay rights have not come nearly as far.  A comment against gay marriage is not, as far as our culture is concerned, nearly as inflammatory or offensive as a racist comment.  It should be.

So, I want it to be clear that I welcome all comments, of any opinion.  And I understand that gay rights remain an ongoing debate, and for that reason I will happily argue about them until my voice is hoarse or until my fingers can’t type anymore.  But this blog is also a product of my own views, and I will not hesitate to come down hard on those who don’t recognize basic civil and human rights.

Reader Comments: Gay Marriage

A reader this week said the following in response to my “I was thinking about marriage again…” post:

I voted against the gayban in Michigan in 2004, because I didn’t understand what the big deal was. I’m straight, single, and whatever gay people want to do isn’t much of my concern. The gayban passed into law by a generous margin, and I felt it was Michigan’s way of telling me I’m wrong. I thought about it. The voting population must include a lot of people who are older, wiser, and married. Of course, it also includes gays and homophobes. But, isn’t that the point? The preservation of the “sanctity of marriage” may be as simple as the majority of married people getting together and declaring a gayban. People who are married are the experts on what marriage is. If most married people happen to be straight then that’s just an unfortunate reality for gays. Maybe gays need to put 2 and 2 together and conclude that marriage really isn’t just about love and God and tax breaks. Maybe it’s also about being straight. And maybe that isn’t going to change for a very long time.

I love that people other than my best friends and my parents are posting comments on my blog.  That said, reader, I’m going to have to vehemently disagree with you.

1. I’m happy to hear that you voted against the ban on gay marriage in 2004.  Good for you.
2. Presumably you just mean that what gay people do with one another sexually and romantically isn’t your concern.  As opposed to nothing they do, since, as a homosexual is no different than you, there is an array of possible things he or she could do that you should care about.  Gay people are not a magical group of pixies that can do no wrong.  They, like you or anyone else, can make priceless contributions to the world.  They can also be ordinary and leave no legacy.  They can also be obnoxious, annoying, stupid, uneducated, conservative, ugly, perverted, violent, and horrible, just like anyone else.
3. I’m curious as to why you took a majority vote that didn’t match your own to be a sign that you were wrong.  I suppose you mean that since we’re in a democracy where generally the will of the people is supposed to guide our lives and our policies and that therefore a majority that disagreed with you would make you wonder if you should just go along with the will of the majority.  But: I voted against Bush in 2004, while the majority voted for him, and I didn’t take that to mean that everyone else must be right.  I doubt that the non-Jewish Germans opposed to the Nazi regime took the masses joining his forces to persecute the Jews to mean that they were wrong and the Jews should be exterminated.  Your logic worries me because that is how religion gets out of hand, that is how people get brainwashed, that is how people in the world stand by and do nothing while something horrible unfolds in front of them, that is why people join cults, that is one of the reasons why the road to civil rights and human equality has been such a long and harrowing one.  Surely you believe that straight people have the right to marry one another; by your logic, if tomorrow you saw a poll showing that the majority of the population was against straight marriage, you would take that to mean that you were wrong–you don’t have the right to marry the person you love.
4. I disagree with your statement that married people are the experts on marriage.  If that’s the case, we can only expect the divorce rate to get higher.  A married person, purely because he or she is married, doesn’t necessarily know anything more about marriage than anyone else.  That’s why people have affairs, get divorced, have miserable marriages, have torturous legal battles, and mess up their kids by using them to get back at the ex– (or current) spouse.  Perhaps people who have been married for more than 20 or 30 years could be considered experts, but I’m even hesitant to say that because there are some perverse reasons and rationale that keep people married: simply being old-fashioned, fear of being alone, waiting until the kids are out of the house, having lots of extramarital sex, religious opposition to divorce, money.  Furthermore, not all straight married couples are against gay marriage, and not everyone against gay marriage is a married heterosexual.
5. What difference does it make that most married people happen to be straight?  Do you not think that a small part of that is because in most states gay people are not legally allowed to get married?  That’s an interesting line of thought: Gay people aren’t allowed to get married—should we let them?  Well…but not very many gay people are currently married—so what’s the point?  Well played.
6. “…put 2 and 2 together”?  Seriously?
7. You’re right.  This may not change for a very long time.  But I feel it is my duty to inform you that this kind of thinking is one of the reasons why.